Perhaps it can't come when riding the fence between two worlds and trying to force them together. I'm not saying a person can't be Mormon and gay and happy, but I think there must be a concession of one half. I FULLY believe that people can be gay and spiritual, loved of G-d, living wonderful lives believing in religion as it feels right to them. I just don't see how one can try to live two lives and have any peace in it.
While I still believe that each person is the only one who can say what is right for his or her particular life, and I will not become judgmental of those who do their best to find a middle ground, I think that more than anything these blogs testify of everything except peace of mind, peace of body, peace of conscience, and peace with self. Without those, especially without peace of self, I wonder how anyone can truly find peace with G-d.
I don't believe G-d hates gays and I don't believe He expects homosexuals to sacrifice what heterosexuals are never asked to sacrifice. I think that people grow and become Christlike when they are in romantic relationships- they learn to sacrifice and love in ways that extend past the love of friendship. Connections that are spiritual, physical, attraction based, and emotional generate a unique, wonderful, and deep type of love. I believe true growth and godliness can come from honesty with self and honest, committed, and romantically in love relationships. When people are in love in all ways, including physically, they can grow, love, and give in more ways than they do for friends, non-romantic soul mates, and families. Love for a romantic partner is amazing and unique and everyone can grow Christlike through that, even more than by loving the way the Church tells homosexuals to love (heterosexually).
Giving up everything that you know, everything that you have ever wanted, everything that you've ever been told was right, everything that has ever mattered to you- in order to find a love that is on every level and in order to be honest, fully honest and true, to yourself, is of a loving Creator. It is of G-d. It is more fair to everyone.
There is importance in marriage- that type of love, connection, and sacrifice can teach us to be more like Christ, more like G-d, just as being parents does. But I honestly believe that for homosexual individuals to have that connection and relationship that is talked about as so important, they need to have it with another person of the same sex. Marriage is amazing and important- but the full scope of those relationships and the growth and joy possible through them is gained, in part, by a physical attraction, connection, and desire. I think that marriage is so important and so talked about because the love that is on every level (including physical attraction) is one of the greatest, most unique, deepest, and amazing types of love with have on this planet. That type of love is found through honesty with self and spouse- it is found in hetero marriages (unions, partnerships) for heteros and gay marriages (or unions, partnerships) for gays.
