Crying

Well, on the bright side, shattering has encouraged me to pick up my scriptures for the first time in a very long while. There is an undeniable peace that comes from the Savior and I can feel His spirit as I read the words I so often neglect.

I am not going to give up or fall backwards. I am going to keep working, feeling, and trying. I don't want to take this path without the person who helped me start it.

I work so hard to make the right choices and then I second guess myself. I am imperfect. I am torn between feeling the self love and approval I've been striving to learn and staying in this fetal position, tears streaking down my face, because I know I've messed up and not been the person I've wanted to be.

Deeper and deeper it is as if I am trapped in the Heart of Darkness.

Maybe there is a medium- I did mess up, I am imperfect, but my intentions are good. I am trying. I am struggling to make the right choices.

And as hard as I try I still got angry and I felt justified. Can everything break because for once you are angry?

"Falling Slowly" from Once over and over again.